How do you navigate one of the most endearing yet complex relationships you could ever have?
Having siblings is a seriously funny dynamic. One second, you hate their guts, and the next you love them to death. It’s inexplicable, but something about all those petty arguments and all that fighting? It just feels right. That’s not to say that these bonds can’t be broken. If you’re not careful, with enough twisting and bending, these bonds can eventually break and become irreparable.
Sibling relationships are like the ultimate long-term investment—they can bring incredible returns if handled properly. From sharing toys to sharing life’s big moments, the bond between siblings can be one of the most enduring and rewarding connections we have. So how can you nurture and maintain a healthy sibling relationship well into adulthood?
Adolescence: [WARNING]…May Bite
Most people tend to agree that one’s teenage years are some of the most turbulent they’ve ever experienced. Between the raging hormones, the formative creation of your own identity, and your unyielding desire for independence, the years where you grow into a young adult are much like the Wild West: you don’t know what you’re going to get. Now add in another teenager or two? Things get a whole lot more complicated.
BUT, with a few tips, this once rough ride can become a whole lot smoother for sibling relationships.
- Get Used to Fights: Arguments and squabbles are an undeniable part of the sibling package. But it’s necessary to learn how to properly voice your feelings and explain why you’re feeling the way you do, without having the need to yell. Escalating the situation does not solve anything. It’s okay to disagree, but it’s much more important to make up and move on.
- Empathy and Compromise: This kind of goes hand in hand with the previous point. Being able to empathize with how a person is feeling is a critical skill to have, especially when it comes to your own family. Practice it frequently and this will lay a foundation of understanding others that will serve you well throughout your life.
- Celebrate Differences: Everyone is special and unique, with their own strengths and weaknesses. Don’t compare yourself or your accomplishments to others. Be proud of what you’ve achieved, but also know that you should be equally happy for your sibling’s achievements as well. Celebrate differences, no matter how big or small.
One additional thing to understand is the need for space and freedom. Teenagers will begin to want more individual time and less family time. That’s totally OK. As siblings, you should learn to respect each other’s boundaries but still try and find time to stay connected, like family movie nights or shared hobbies.
Adulthood: A Bond that’ll Never Break
After all that trouble and effort, you and your siblings have now grown into full-fledged adults with their own careers, identities, and maybe even families of their own. You’re now each other’s biggest supporters and can look back on all the fights you’ve had over the years as the fondest memories. There really is no better feeling. There’s not much more to teach here, but always remind yourself that although everyone may live in different places, make an effort to stay connected. Check up on each other to see how everyone’s doing and catch up on the regular. Be invested in each other’s lives in order to maintain that strong bond that you’ve cultivated previously.
Are you reading this as an adult and feel like you haven’t reached this stage yet? Don’t worry, you still have tons of time. Just remember to continue practicing empathy, communication, and respect.
Fostering a healthy sibling relationship is an ongoing journey. It starts with shared joys and play in childhood, navigating the ups and downs of adolescence, and requires continued effort into adulthood. It’s the little moments of connection, the willingness to understand, and the consistent support that make sibling bonds truly special. Invest in these relationships, and they will bring you a lifetime of joy.
