Think about a time when you met someone who you thought was “the one” — It felt so magical and fulfilling like a fairy tale. You received so much affection, attention, and gifts… BUT then it suddenly takes a turn, becoming a nightmare and making you feel confused and hurt. You might second-guess that person and wonder if it was real or if it was all just a game, maybe LOVE GAMES?
I mean, how can you even tell the difference between genuine love and love games? And why do people enjoy them?
Games can be difficult to detect, and often we don’t even realize that we’re playing them until it’s too late — We’re addicted and heartbroken. Narcissists enjoy playing these games because it gives them a sense of control and power over others… it’s like their life support, something that keeps them alive. Once a narcissist traps you, the game continues into a cycle of toxicity.
It’s important to recognize these behaviors and to protect yourself from them.
Let’s break down the 5 love games narcissists use and how to end them.
5 Love Games That Keep You Addicted
1. LOVE BOMBING
Narcissists use this to gain control over their victims. Love bombing involves showering the victim with excessive attention, affection, and gifts to create an intense emotional connection and sense of dependency. This also includes flattery, compliments, promises, declarations of love such as saying “I love you” quickly, and rushing into commitment.
2. GASLIGHTING
Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse where the narcissist manipulates their victim into doubting their own perception of reality. The narcissist may deny, minimize, deflect or twist their behavior to make the victim feel confused, insecure, and vulnerable.
3. GHOSTING
Once the victim falls into their trap and becomes dependent, narcissists may use ghosting as a way to punish their victims for not meeting their needs or expectations, or as a way to manipulate them into complying with their demands. They can also avoid confrontation by giving the silent treatment and maintain superiority.
4. HOOVERING
Hoovering is a tactic where the narcissist tries to re-engage with their victim after a breakup or period of separation. This behavior may involve apologizing, making promises, or using other manipulation tactics to regain control over the victim.
5. TRIANGULATION
Triangulation is a tactic where the narcissist involves a third party in the relationship to create jealousy, confusion, or competition. They may talk about their ex-partner or flirt with someone else to make their current partner feel insecure and inferior.
How To End The Love Games?
It’s one thing to be aware of the structure and patterns of behavior of love games, and it’s another thing to actually take action in handling them. Here are just a few steps you can take to protect yourself.
Setting Boundaries
Setting healthy boundaries is one of the most important things you can do. Be clear about your needs and expectations in the relationship, and don’t compromise them for the sake of keeping the narcissist happy. Express what you’re comfortable with and what you are not. Don’t be afraid to speak up and assert yourself.
Avoid Engaging
Narcissists thrive on attention and drama. They can be extremely manipulative and may try to provoke you. Stay calm and don’t get sucked into their games and don’t give them the attention they crave.
Focus on Self-Love & Self-Care
Self-love is one factor that can also affect your relationships, not just you. Take care of yourself physically, mentally, and emotionally. Prioritize your own needs and well-being. Remember that their behavior is not about you, but about their own insecurities and need for control.
Distancing or Walk Away
Take your time getting to know someone before committing to a serious relationship. If the relationship is toxic and damaging to your well-being, consider creating distance or ending the relationship altogether. Trying to change or fix them often backfires.
Seek Support
Having a strong support system can help you navigate the challenges of dealing with a narcissist.
Remember, healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, trust, and genuine affection, not manipulation and exploitation.
